Friday, October 12, 2007

Disgusting

So today I bought myself a Mountain Dew so I'd have cold drink while waiting for the bus to drop off the kids. I took about two swallows and realized that something was horribly wrong. It was all I could do to keep from running around the parking lot shrieking, "The aftertaste! The aftertaste!" Instead, I steeled myself and trepidatiously inspected the label. It was as I feared.

I had purchased diet Mountain Dew by mistake.

I honestly don't know how people can stand to drink diet soft drinks. Every one I've ever accidentally sampled (this has happened before--the most notorious instance involving diet 7 Up), every one, I say, tastes like some kind of toxic by-product from a glue factory. With bubbles.

P.S. "Trepidatiously" is apparently not in the dictionary, but it should be.

5 comments:

  1. I'm with you my friend. And to all those who say they taste the same: What kind of drugs are you on 'cause they must be good.

    The worst part is the aftertaste. If I don't have anything available to adequately wash the vile abomination from my mouth, I'll be tasting it for an hour.

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  2. Did you ever put an old penny in your mouth when you were a little kid? That's what the aftertaste of diet drinks tastes like to me.

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  3. That's funny, I hadn't tasted a sugared soda in about 15 years and I recently took a gulp out of the wrong cup and my face about caved in from the taste.

    I can't believe I used to drink regular :)

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  4. Diet soda = 100% artificial stuff. There is not one single component in diet soda that is meant to be consumed by a human.

    What I find hilarious is diet tea. I mean, WTF. Why put artificial sweetener in tea? It's either regular (sweet) or unsweetened. It is sometimes very hard to find unsweetened tea in a convenience store.

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  5. Bwaaahaha! The penny comment was on the money...and yes, diet soft drinks are good for absolutely nothing. I've heard diet Dr Pepper is pretty good, though I've never tried it.

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