So today I bought myself a Mountain Dew so I'd have cold drink while waiting for the bus to drop off the kids. I took about two swallows and realized that something was horribly wrong. It was all I could do to keep from running around the parking lot shrieking, "The aftertaste! The aftertaste!" Instead, I steeled myself and trepidatiously inspected the label. It was as I feared.
I had purchased diet Mountain Dew by mistake.
I honestly don't know how people can stand to drink diet soft drinks. Every one I've ever accidentally sampled (this has happened before--the most notorious instance involving diet 7 Up), every one, I say, tastes like some kind of toxic by-product from a glue factory. With bubbles.
P.S. "Trepidatiously" is apparently not in the dictionary, but it should be.