From a meme I read at Baboon Pirates.
Do you remember your first favorite song? If so, what was it?
Yes. The first song I claimed as a favorite was an old hymn called "Here We Are But Straying Pilgrims" when I was 3 or 4 years old.
What do you refuse to eat?
Bologna. Vienna sausages. Any organ meat. Macaroni and cheese. Spinach. Collard greens. Poke greens. Anything containing even the slightest sub-microscopic speck of avocado. Even typing the word "avocado" makes me feel a little queasy. You just can't imagine how sick that stuff makes me. I could go on.
Have you ever injected any kind of drug before?
Only when prescribed by a doctor, and then I didn't do it myself.
Do amusement park rides make you sick?
I don't know, because I've never been on one, and I don't care ever to try it.
Who is your favorite Star Wars character?
Obiwan Kenobi.
What kind of cheese do you put on your sandwiches?
I like all kinds of cheese, but I usually use American for the convenience.
What was the first thing you ever learned how to cook?
Frying a hamburger patty, probably.
Did you ever collect beanie babies?
You gotta be kidding.
When was the last time you got a haircut?
The last time I got a haircut was at least 20 years ago. I've been cutting my own hair ever since.
Have you ever been to a bachelor/bachelorette party?
No.
Where are you most ticklish on your body?
I'm not.
Have you ever bailed anyone out of jail?
No.
What's the last board game you played?
Monopoly with my kids.
Do you still own any VHS tapes?
Of course.
Do you shop at JC Penney's ever?
Once. My wife and I were given a JCP gift certificate for a wedding gift 15 years ago, and we used it to buy an ornamental rug.
If there was a real Jurassic Park, would you visit it?
No. I would nuke it from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.
Do you ever read the newspaper?
The local one. Not the big city one.
Do you eat your mac & cheese with a fork or a spoon?
See above.
Is there any medicine/pill you take everyday?
Only a multi-vitamin.
How many 20 dollar bills do you have on you right now?
None.
Would you do meth if it was legalized?
Would you shoot yourself in the head if suicide was legalized?
Do you think Obama will be assassinated?
I certainly hope not.
Have you ever made out with someone and then never saw them again?
No. Didn't happen often, but when it did it was with girls I associated with on a fairly regular basis for various reasons (school, work), so I always saw them again.
Do you drink egg nog?
I have, but it's not one of my favorite things to drink. And I think it's tastes disgusting with any alcohol in it. Milk & alcohol? Gurk. I'd rather make hot toddies or hot buttered rums or hot spiced wines.
What are you wearing?
A long-sleeved plaid flannel shirt and flannel pajama pants with glow-in-the-dark Jolly Roger skulls all over them.
Jolly. Roger. Pants. Make of that what you will...
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