Yeah, that's right. This gimmick was created by the Postal Service, whose poor babies are stupid enough to let themselves get bitten even though they constantly tempt fate by wearing those goofy-looking grandpa shorts, and even though they never have to climb a fence into someone's backyard that's overgrown like a Congo rain forest in July and spend 15 minutes digging through the brush for a gas meter that's been covered up intentionally because it just doesn't look very chic, all the while watching their six to make sure the family Cujo doesn't dash in for a quick nip. Even though they're never more than 5 minutes walk from their mailmobile. Even though they have time to take a whole hour for lunch, sitting on their fat butts in a southside taqueria, and daring to stop me to ask stupid questions about meter installation when I'm obviously not in the mood to slow down for anyone and I obviously don't have a truck full of meters, tools and other gear like the installation guys do. Even though they spray dogs that aren't a threat in the first place because it yips at them a few times, just to make sure I have a tougher time of it next time I have to go read the meter.
My heart bleeds for them all.
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