Wednesday, June 02, 2010

Also I used to have the hots for Jamie Lee Curtis

So about 4:00 PM today my cell phone "rang." Although it doesn't really ring. It plays a short ambient-chillish ringtone that came loaded on it already, and which to me sounds like it could be the beginning of a nice relaxing piece of electronic music. I chose it because 1) I like it, and 2) no one else uses it, so I know when it goes off that it's mine. Also a lot of people seem to be annoyed by it, which is a bonus.

Anyway it was a number I didn't recognize but it was the second time today I had seen it. Also it was one of those old-fashioned 1-800 numbers back when all toll free numbers were still "800s" and were once known as a WATS line and I think they still technically are but I haven't heard anyone use that term in a long time. So although I don't usually answer strange number calls I decided to see what was up with this one.*

Some woman asked me if she could speak with Lance. I told her she had the wrong number, so she verified the number she had called, which was mine but obviously wrong. "Is this a new number for you, maybe?" she asked. "No," I answered, "I've had this number for...a long time...remember back when T-Mobile used to be Voicestream?" "Oh wow," she said, "that is an old number."

Then she added, "'ve never heard of Lance Lafontaine?"

I said, "Nope, sorry," but I wanted to say, "No, but now that you mention it I think I will be changing my name. That's just awesome."

So she said she'd remove my number from their call list. That must be the coolest name I've ever heard from a wrong number. Maybe someday I'll use it for a pen-name.

*A couple of different reverse phone number lookups yielded no results.


  1. It sounds like the name of an "endowed" porn star to me.

  2. I was thinking the same thing.